Happy December!

Sometimes I think vacation are really unfair. Work gives you so many days off, and you use them accordingly, doing whatever you want. Then the harsh reality of Monday (or whatever day) sets in and you realize that you have exactly six hours left of vacation before you have to go back to work. It's so mean, giving us a glimpse of what life could be like if we were all independently wealthy and could sit in our pajamas until five in the evening if we wanted.

Why, yes, that is what I did for five days.

Okay, sure, I put on some real people clothing on some of the days, but more often than not, I wasn't out of pajamas before the sun went down. And you know what? It was wonderful. It was so nice not having to worry about schedules and homework and book club and what new catastrophe my boss was going to throw at me that day. It was nice to sit at home, watch TV, drink copious amounts of tea, and do nothing more strenuous than wonder which book I should buy on Black Friday (spoiler alert: I bought all the books). It truly is the most wonderful time of the year, and I'm counting down the days until Christmas vacation.

The downside to the laziness is that I didn't get as much editing done as I wanted. This is where you're rolling your eyes and muttering, Like, what? None? Hardy har har. I managed to get a whole chapter and a half done. But, really, what could I expect when Amazon was flooding my email with promises of Kindle books for under two dollars? And now it's all rainy outside, and we never get rain. My bed is warm, my cat is asleep, and the house is quiet. That's what I had for five days (minus the rain. That came on day five) and I was not in the mood to sequester myself away in a bedroom and edit. I had my boyfriend home for four days! Do you realize how nice it is to see your significant other home all day, instead of for just a few hours at night when you get home before you both have to go to bed? It's all kinds of lovely.

Yes, these are excuses. But I think they're good ones.

I guess, short story short, I didn't do what I said I was going to do. Shocker. I think I'm still shooting for a March release, though, so that should kick my butt into gear somewhere around the New Year. We've already got our plans down for Christmas, and (shhhhh) I might edit during our little vacation. Not that I don't want to appreciate our vacation, but we're headed to Vegas, and for someone who doesn't really drink or go to clubs or gamble, sometimes that place can get a bit boring. I do like the slot machines, but I do not like watching my money go down and down until my heart starts pounding like a jackhammer. It's not a fun feeling. So I like to hang out in the hotel room and do whatever until we can eat. Because, for some reason, Vegas has so much delicious food. So. Much. I'll cart the manuscript along with me and see what I can get done. Hopefully, at that time, it'll be the second read through, and then all you people will be eating your words! Like the delicious food in Vegas.

Okay. Now I'm hungry.

The NaNo Finish Line

I haven't updated anything yet, but I'm done with NaNo! I finished sometime last week and didn't even realize it. I opened my story yesterday and saw the word count, and then I breathed a sigh of relief. This month has been a mess. We double booked ourselves this weekend (we straightened it out, thankfully) and then thinking about everything that we have to do in the upcoming months to finally get settled...it's been stressful. This is why people shouldn't laugh when I say I wish I was a wizard. Wave my wand and poof! Everything is in its place and I can relax.

So now I have two more days of work and then I'm off for about five days. It's terribly exciting because I'll have time to really clean the house and (drumroll, please) I'm going to pull out the Amory manuscript. I've been thinking about it a lot lately and it's just sitting there in my nightstand, waiting patiently. So while I have absolutely nothing to do (well, relatively less to do), I'm going to get started on it. The house will be quiet, all the crazy people will be out trying to buy things that they don't need, and I'll (hopefully) have a clean house. Throw in some tea, and it'll be perfect.

What does that mean for today, though? Well, I have nothing to update, really. I'm done with NaNo, I'll start Amory this week, and my house is a mess. Did that cover everything?

Does that mean I'm allowed a little rant?

It's not so much a rant as it is somewhat of an epiphany. When I was a teenager, I used to subscribe religiously to Seventeen and YM. Really, I did it for the hot guys in there, but I liked to read those magazines from cover to cover and try to learn something. One of the articles that has always stuck with me was this one about body language and how to hold yourself in certain situations. For example, instead of leaning back and tapping your pencil during class, lean forward, place your hand under your chin, and cross your ankles under your desk. It'll make it appear as though you're paying attention.

The magazine never told you to actually pay attention. They just said to make it look like you were.

Anyway, another piece of advice they gave was, when dancing, don't move to every single beat. Skip a beat, tap your feet every now and again, and you'll be a winner. I think about that each time we go to a concert and see people thrashing around to whatever beat they hear in their head. As it's supposed to be. Because I have no idea what YM  was talking about. Why did they think that they could dictate our dance moves? I only thought about all this because we went to a concert on Friday night and I saw this one girl dancing like no one was watching. Her friend kept glancing at her and trying to imitate her, like the first girl was YM. It made me kind of sad.

Basically; dance how you want. Go nuts. Everyone else is too busy having fun to care how you're dancing.

Well, unless you're thrashing around and ramming your elbow into my side several hundred times and swinging your hair into my mouth. Then I'm going to care, GIRL THAT WOULDN'T STOP ON FRIDAY.

Now I'm done. For everyone that celebrates it, have a happy Thanksgiving, and be careful on Friday if you are brave enough to venture outside of your house. I'll be thinking of you while I'm wrapped up in my TARDIS blanket with my laptop out, buying things safely from my couch.

Time Flies

What do you mean, it's been more than three weeks??

Yeah, yeah, I know. I thought that I was going to move all my junk into the new place and then immediately be ready to get my life going the very next day. Were you aware that moving is a seemingly never-ending process? Did you know that all your crap piled into boxes seems like way more of a burden than your crap just harmlessly sitting out? Did you further know that dealing with a cat while moving is not a fun experience, especially when that cat is no longer allowed on the bed and all she seems to do is try to find a way onto the bed?

Needless to say, things have been messy lately.

That doesn't mean that I decided to skip NaNo! Well, really, I almost did. We moved in on Halloween, then had a horrendous time at the LA Haunted Hayride (seriously, heavy stuff fell on us and it was pouring rain while we sat there in a tractor trailer full of hay), and then the next weekend, we went out of town for three days. I still have work, everyone in the house seems to be getting sick at different times, and the anxiety of not having everything in its place sometimes takes over my mind. But then I remembered how much fun I have zoning out for a few hours and writing. So that settled it. I may have been behind for a week or two, but I caught up. Now I'm cruising along and I should be done by the end of November.

It's not the best writing. Rereading over the stuff I've done, I understand that. But it's nice to write again. It's nice to imagine scenes and characters, and, yes, I'm beginning to miss Amory. Wasn't that the whole point of this month? To miss her and actually want to get back to her? Well, it's working. I found myself thinking about her instead of NaNo last night, which can be dangerous sometimes, but I'm trying this new thing, I believe it's called exercising willpower? You know, when you have something that you really want to do, but you know you have to do other things before that, so you're responsible and do those things first? It's a novelty, I know, but I'm trying it. And it's not like I have to do NaNo, I get that, but I've committed. I want to do it. So, fingers crossed that the next time I write on this thing, I'm not like, Hey, let me tell you what, I stopped NaNo because that's ridiculous and now I'm working on Amory, and then next week I'll be doing something else.

Because I'm insane.

The good thing is that next week is the wonderful holiday we Americans call Thanksgiving. Not because it's a particularly good holiday (I mean, really, let's look at our history, shall we?), but because I get three days off from work. A whole five days, if we count the weekend, which we're going to. As much as I want to spend all five days staring at the wall and pretending like I don't have responsibilities, I'm hoping to get a lot of writing down and maybe finishing. Well, I'm going to have to, because I just realized that the end of November is next week.

Huh. Time, what a strange thing.

I guess I should get off this thing and get to work. Not writing. Of course not. I have to clean and pretend like there aren't a million boxes waiting to be unpacked. Nope. I can't see you, boxes. Not if I close my eyes tight enough.

Cleaning should be fun like that.

Izzy Moffit's Road to Wonderland

Been awhile, hasn't it? It feels like I haven't been near this thing in years, which makes sense because it's been about two weeks. In the land of the internet, that's like at least two centuries.

But now I'm back and I get to talk about this amazing, wonderful, terrific book that I read: Izzy Moffit's Road to Wonderland by Victoria L. James. When the ladies at Bare Naked Words offered this book to me, I jumped on it. Without hesitation. It sounded intriguing and fun, and I was right! Just read this synopsis and not be interested:

Making it to seventeen in one piece isn’t usually a concern for your average teenager, but if there’s one thing Isabella Moffit has never been, it’s average. Dragged through life by parents who couldn’t care less and surrounded by violence on a daily basis, Izzy reaches that epic birthday milestone in her life with only one person to thank for getting her there: her best friend and soul sister, Paris Hemsworth. 

Vowing to stand side by side through thick and thin since they were four years old, the two of them have made it this far and are confident that now is their time to tackle the world head on, one shaky, naive little footstep at a time.

Except they have no idea what awaits them both on the other side of adulthood, and before either one of them can strap on their hard hat, they’re taking so many knocks and bruises that Izzy’s childhood suddenly seems like a stroll in the park.

Dodging as many bullets as they can along the way, Izzy tries to hold on to Paris’ hand for as long as possible without either one of them slipping away. But no-one ever told them how rough their journey would be. No-one told them that friends and family would change or leave along the way. And no-one told them that for every good intention they have, there’s a thousand people out there with bad ones, waiting to rip them apart.

Follow Izzy’s journey in part one of the Road to Wonderland series - a coming of age novel with a difference, where you’ll face tears, tantrums, laughter and heartbreak, but above all else, hope. Hope that no matter what life throws your way, it’s all part of setting you on the right path to your very own Wonderland and that, more often than not, everything happens for a reason.

Super awesome, right? This book is so much better than I can say. This was an emotional journey from beginning to end. When I thought that Izzy's story was going to be about one thing, it was about another, and the turns kept coming. This poor girl is hit with everything under the sun, and still she perseveres, because she is that strong and that faithful to herself. It's beautiful and sweet and utterly terrible at times, but Izzy and Paris are so wonderful. Their friendship is amazing, the kind of friendship that people wish for. I think the best part about this book was that, of course, there were guys and relationships and love and all that junk, but it's mainly about a girl trying to find her way through life and trying to keep those that she loves afloat, as well. 

Here's all the links that you'll need in order to find this little piece of awesomeness:

• Amazon.com: http://amzn.to/1qB3jbE

• Amazon.co.uk: http://amzn.to/1pfXoIA

Victoria L James is a teenage girl stuck in a thirty-something year-olds body. Living somewhere 'oop north' in England, she has had a strong passion for words and stories going as far back as she can remember, which she credits to her grandmother and her love of reading anything that was on sale and cheap from the local market stall. Never once did she think she would release a novel, though. At best, she thought her love of language and her ability to create stories in her mind would provide her with a 'get out of jail free' card whenever she messed up and her parents were mad at her during her teenage years... and when even that didn't work out, she thought she was pretty much done for.

When an opportunity presented itself for her to take a back seat from paid working life for a few years, she knew straight away that she had to try and write about a few of these worlds she'd come up with along the way, and quieten all the voices in her head without racking up a heavy psychiatry bill for the pleasure.

Wearing her heart on her sleeve and trying to lighten her friends’ and family’s lives with naff, and more often than not, badly timed, nineties jokes, she has yet to learn the art of knowing when to shut up. Which is another reason writing became a passion of hers. With pen and paper, there are no limits.

A firm believer in never quitting, with a ridiculous obsession for all things Rocky, she hopes that one day she writes a story that will inspire at least one person out there to keep on going if they're struggling. Other than that, she's just a regular old converse wearing, corona sipping, English version of Chandler Bing, who loves and adores her family more than life itself. Oh, and she also has two cats. Every writer has to mention their cats, right? Connect with her at the following links:

• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/VictoriaLJamesAuthor
• Wonderland Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/RTWSeries
• Twitter: @Victoria_LJames

Also! Click the link below for a chance to win some books and other goodies:

• http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/95cb028286/

Okay, I'm done. Go forth and grab this book. Read it. Savor it. Enjoy it.

It's That Time Again...

So, it's the middle of October. How did that happen? Seriously, didn't we just have summer vacation? Time is ridiculous.

Anyway, it's the middle of October. I've finished my first draft. I printed it out, I have all the materials I need to start editing, and it's just sitting on my couch, waiting for me. Well, I have news for that sweet little manuscript: it's going to have to wait a bit longer.

I move in exactly eighteen days. I've cleaned out some cupboards and my closet, but that doesn't amount to much. I haven't started packing anything (I don't even have boxes!), but that's about to change. I've made a schedule for me, starting this week, that deals with cleaning and packing and all those other pesky moving things. I won't be working on it all day, every day (OBVIOUSLY), but it does leave me little time to sit down and start editing. So, like I said before, it's going to have to wait a bit longer. How much longer? Well, how about three weeks?

Yes, three weeks.

This gives me plenty of time to pack, clean, and move, without the added hassle of carving time out of my schedule to edit. I don't want to rush it, and I don't want to make (too many) mistakes. It would be best for all involved (i.e., my manuscript and me) if I take some time off to get this apartment packed (plus my boyfriend's condo...YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW MANY SHIRTS THAT BOY HAS) and get moved into the new house.

You know what this means, right? Of course you do.

I'm taking a break from this blog (except for one post, and I'll get to that later). Not that I don't have time to write out a quick post or anything, but what am I supposed to talk about if I'm not writing? Tentatively, I'm still doing NaNo in November, so I'll be posting kind of frequently next month, but this month is done. It's over. I'm calling it. I have to be lame and be an adult, and that means being responsible (YUCK), so I'm stepping back for just three weeks. Twenty-one days. Then I'm back.

Except...I do have one little blog post that will be coming up the last week of this month. It's about this amazingly awesome book I read earlier this month and I'll be posting about it. When the time gets closer, I'll let everyone know, and hopefully it'll take the sting away of me being gone for awhile.

I'm going to end this before I embarrass myself further.

Three More Weeks

Warning: this is going to be a quick little update because my apartment needs to be cleaned and organized and packed in the next three weeks, and I've decided to take on four projects in my house at once because stress is a great motivator, right?

I don't know what I'm doing.

Anyway, let's get right to it: I didn't start editing this weekend. I spent my weekend in a house with no air conditioning when the temperatures outside were reaching triple digits and my allergies decided that this would be the best weekend to start acting up. Because, really, that's exactly what else I needed! So, I read a lot and stared at the wall a lot, but I couldn't bring myself to sit down in a quiet place and start editing. Just thinking about it made me tired, and I was already tired from not getting enough sleep! It sounds like I had a really rough weekend, and I really didn't. I played with two adorable dogs, hung out with my boyfriend, and only had to put on real people's clothing twice: once to get pizza, the other time to get donuts. I shouldn't be complaining, but my nose is still angry with me.

Honestly, I'm planning on getting started tonight. Once I make a Wal-Mart run and get supplies I need for my projects, everything else will fall into place. It's mainly just organizing and cleaning things out, but it seems like so much more. Once I stop typing this, I'm getting in the shower and I'm gone.

I guess all this means...sorry. I have nothing to update today! This month is going to be nuts and full of stress, but I'll try to do what I can with editing and all that. Also, next month is November, and that means NaNo! I think I'm going to do it this year, because I can't imagine not doing it, but we're busy on some weekends in November, so I'm going to have to really rely on the week if I want to write. I have an idea for a story, one that's been in my head for the last several years, so if it all happens to pan out this month, I think it'll be easy for me to get it going. Here's hoping!

Okay, I'm getting out of here before the tree limb that broke last night decides to have a friend join in and then my apartment is completely covered by sad tree limbs. I'll try to update during the week on Twitter or Instagram or Tumblr. Just to let you guys know that I'm working and doing things, and not just sitting on the couch watching The Vampire Diaries. Although, you know, I will be doing that at some point today. Let's be honest.

Stop Me If You've Heard This Before...

So. Friday. The end of the week. The beginning of the weekend. Nothing much happens on a Friday.

Okay, I'm not very good at being nonchalant, so I may as well just shout it out: I'm done! Finished! Other such synonyms that mean to be completed!

Yes, that's right, loyal readers, I finished writing. I actually finished on Tuesday, but then I was preparing stuff for work and moving and jobs and NaNo, so I kind of forgot to inform anyone about my amazing feat. So that's what I'm doing right now. I'm letting you all know that I'm absolutely amazing and I finished what I set out to do and I'm the greatest person in the entire universe.

Whoa, conceited much, right?

I have to be right now. Do you know what's sitting on my couch at this very moment? Sitting there, staring at me, waiting for me to go over there and acknowledge it? If you said my manuscript all bounded with highlighters and sticky notes sitting on top of it, you'd be right. Editing. The bane of my existence. It starts this weekend. I (sadly) might have this whole weekend to myself, and, if I do, there's no excuse for not beginning the editing process right away. If, however, I don't have the weekend to myself, I guess it could wait until Monday, right? Because Monday is when we do all those things we hate, all those things that we shoved off so we could enjoy our weekend.

In case you think I'm just being dramatic, I suggest you revisit my other posts on editing. Then you'll understand that my hatred for it runs deep.

Luckily, I won't have time to start editing after I finish writing this. I woke up this morning and realized that it's October 3rd. That date means nothing to me, but it does mean that I have exactly four weeks until I have to be out of my apartment. Four weeks sounds like a long time (a month!), but I'm one of those people that start to think about everything that needs to be done, then it snowballs into projects that will (in my mind) take days to complete, and I have to get started right away. Honestly, I could probably pack up my apartment and do everything I need to do in about two weeks, but I might as well get started earlier so I could be done earlier, right? That makes sense in the adult world, I'm guessing.

So now I'm off to clean out the rest of my cupboards and the closet (a project I started weeks ago and never really finished). The editing will have to wait! Darn.

The Dangerous Business of Adulting

After thirty one years, you'd think that you'd know yourself. But then you find out things about you that really surprise you. What thing, you ask? Well, I found out that I'm terrible at writing at night and on the weekends.

Yep, I tried to write this weekend and it was more or less a disaster. I could not focus very well and most of the stuff I wrote I ended up deleting because it didn't make much sense. Then I came home last night and thought, well, I guess I'll try to repair the damage and write for an hour or so. Looking back at it this morning, I'm just giving myself more grief than anything. A lot of the stuff doesn't make sense or doesn't quite fit in with the story, and a lot of it was rushed. That's what happens when I know I can go to bed, but I feel the need to write.

The sucky thing is that I write best in the morning. Why does that suck? Because what's going to happen when I get a job where I work normal people hours? What's going to happen when I leave my house at eight in the morning and don't get home until five? Does one learn how to be a nighttime writer? I don't know how this works. Adulting is hard.

Besides the adult crisis I seem to be having, the story is going pretty well. I'm at about 64,000 words with plenty more story to write. I figured out a major plot hole in my story, so that was exciting. I realize that it sounds like I'm just making this up as I go along, and while some parts I am, I've had the entire plot figured out for the last six years. I know where I'm going, I know what the characters are going to go through, but there were some things that I didn't quite know how to get around. Those things have been a process, and now that I've figured them all out, I think the rest of writing will go rather smoothly.

Can you imagine? Something going smoothly!

But, for now, I may take the day off so I can make pumpkin bread and watch Once Upon A Time. I know, I'm very dedicated to writing. But, honestly, my fingers feel like they're about to fall off from the marathon writing sessions I had last week. Besides, I'm going to see Against Me! tonight, so I'm too excited to do much of anything. Other than bake and watch TV, of course.

Of course.

Week O' Writing!

There was a concert this week. A new South Park episode. Knotts Scary Farm opened last night. The only night I didn't do anything was on Monday (I go to my boyfriend's to watch TV since I don't have cable, and South Park night turned into Gotham night, as well). This is the point in the blog post where I'm supposed to tell you that this is going to be a short post since I didn't get much writing done.

Oh really, suckers??

I don't know what's wrong with me. Sorry.

Anyway, I think on Monday I had about 25,000 to 30,000 words. Now I'm at 52,000 and not even done. How did I do that, one may ask? I totally cheated. Not really. I used the old Frankenstein method. Some parts I wrote this week, and then other parts I pasted in from the first manuscript. It sounds terrible, I know, but there were certain parts of the first manuscript that I thought were really well written and I really liked them. So I wanted to include them. While that also meant a lot of rewriting and gluing together of the old and new, it was worth it. I'm already liking this version a lot more than the old one. I think my main problem with the first manuscript was the fact that there was so much time between scenes. For example, one scene I was looking at this week took place months after the last scene. I almost hit myself. Months! You understand that we're in the middle of a war, right, Bree? I'm pretty sure the other side isn't going to wait around for months while their enemy prepares themselves and their land. So, among other goals, I've tried to tighten up the timeline, to make everything happen as quickly as possible. So far, I think I've done a pretty good job.

Another huge change from this manuscript is that a certain character has been turned into a good character. In the first manuscript, he/she inexplicably went from being super evil to such a sweetheart. He/she was another big reason I wanted to rewrite. I realized that I really had no endgame for him/her. I didn't know what I was going to do with him/her. So I thought about it most of the summer, because, in my original ideas, I was planning on killing one of the main characters at the end of the series. But then I started having cold feet about that. I wasn't sure if it would work and I didn't know how my heart would handle it. So I started looking for a scapegoat of sorts. And I found one. And the ending, all of a sudden, made sense. But I had to get this character to be good. And that's when another idea came to me, one that I sort of kind of loved. So now I'm following that line of thinking, and I really like it. I'm not sure how it'll work with readers, but I adore it. So take that.

But that's it! I've been writing! Yay! Now I should get going so I can prepare lessons and think about why Knott's Scary Farm feels like sucking this year. Seriously, if any of my readers live in Southern California, let me warn you: we waited in one line for about an hour and fifteen minutes, and then another one for about an hour. We managed to get through two mazes before fifty billion people came in the park. I don't know what happened this year, but it was a mess. We usually go the first night and are able to go through all the mazes before 11 p.m. We left around that time after waiting for an hour for Trapped, which we got a refund for because "people were vomiting and freaking out and that takes time to get everything cleaned up".

Right. Well, I can't fault them for their scare tactics!

The Weekend Lazy Monster

This post was supposed to go up so long ago, but I've been trying to fix this stupid neckache (thanks to the cat deciding that she wants to be a contortionist while she sleeps and that I should work around her) and it finally just went away. Also, I may have needed some time to myself after watching Emma Watson at the HeForShe launch (I swear, this lady. Gorgeous all around).

So. It's Monday. What did I do with my weekend, one may ask? I did absolutely nothing! It was really exciting. So, that means I got a lot of writing done, right? Ha. Haha. Hahahahahahaha. Right. I spent the entire weekend reading (hey, I finished two books, so the weekend is going down as a win) and watching my boyfriend and his dad build part of a deck. Then I ate a ton of pizza. Did you really expect me to get any writing done with any of that going on?

Okay, okay, so I may have messed up a little this weekend. I know that I should write on the weekends because I have hours and hours of time, and I don't have to feel guilty spending those hours doing nothing but writing. But, for some reason, when the weekend comes, I'm out. My entire body feels like if I do anything more strenuous than reading and eating pizza, I might just die. Dramatic, I know, but each time I think about grabbing my computer and writing, a rather obnoxious voice in my head tells me, Um, no, this is the weekend. We're not supposed to do anything more strenuous than read and eat pizza. (Can you tell that I really enjoy reading and eating pizza?) It's like I get writer's block, but only on Saturday and Sunday.

But after the last post on Friday, I did manage to get a lot of writing done. I think I got a couple thousand words, so that's not bad. At least I'm out of Donnie's oceanside village and into a much warmer climate. This is kind of a tricky part, so I have to dedicate some time to getting it right, because the last time, these chapters were kind of muddled and confusing. It's a lot of referring back to the first book and then matching it up with everything that everyone has been saying in this book and...It could be a mess. So, I have to take my time on this part. 

The only time I have to myself this week is the mornings, so I'm going to try to fit in some writing while I go about everything else I have to do. I have a tentative schedule in my head of everything I need to do and fitting writing into that mix, so hopefully I'll get more done this week. 

I guess I could just stop playing The Sims 4 for a week.

Ha. Haha. Hahahahahahahaha. I'm hilarious today.

Updates and Setbacks

Since Mordor conditions have persisted this week, I haven't been writing as much as I would like. For reals, it's been about a thousand degrees here this whole week. No exaggeration. My poor air conditioning has been running like mad this whole week and it's finally getting some kind of rest since it's only 71 degrees today with 57% humidity. That's a good day, people! It's supposed to get up to 81! Break out the wool sweaters, fall has arrived!

My sarcasm makes even me roll my eyes sometimes.

Also, remember that little picture I shared of the books I still have to read? It was adorable, right? Good, because I went back to the library and they had two books on hold for me and then I bought three more books on Kindle and help I think I have a problem. Where is the closest Bookaholics Anonymous meeting?

I was going to surprise everyone and share a release date that I thought I had worked out, but this week has thrown it for a loop. Still, the general time frame that I'm looking for is sometime after the new year. Originally, I was going to make it for March because of NaNo, but I think I'm pushing it up. Unless I find something to do for NaNo this year. Then it'll be pushed back again. I'll know more for sure around the end of October, because I have to remember that I'm also moving the beginning of November.

Sometimes I wish that the future was now and we had robots to do all these things for us. And these robots weren't super expensive.

Anyway, things are going to get back to normal this weekend since we only have one thing to do on Saturday and I'm actually going to buckle down. My dad asked me the other day how my book was going and I felt like an idiot telling him that I hated the first draft so I started rewriting it. I mean, that part was okay, but then when I told him that I was only a few chapters in, I had to smack myself on the head. I started rewriting this thing so long ago and I feel like I should be almost done. I've been so distracted by other things (THANKS SIMS 4) and stressed about other things (THANKS WORK AND MOVING). But I've been slowing organizing everything and trying to work on relaxation with work and finding a new job, so I think it'll be okay. That's why I was going to share the release date, because I thought that I had worked it all out. Sigh. I'm a failure once more.

Oh wells!

Oh, another quick note before I go off into the mess that is my apartment. After the new year, I'm looking to move to another website and maybe adding some book reviews. I signed up for this book review website and I post my reviews on Goodreads, but sometimes the books that I want need a for reals website or else they won't give me ARCs. Rude. If I have time, I'm thinking about doing that. Sorry. I mean, if you don't like book reviews. Or reviews. Or books.

Um....what the hell are you doing here?

What Frodo and I Have In Common

The plan for today was to post this around nine, after I finished cleaning out my closet (now I hope Eminem is stuck in your head), but I guess I got a little nuts, because I still haven't finished cleaning out my closet. This has been going on since about 7:30, when my apartment decided that being hot is the way to go. Honestly, this 90-whatever degree weather is stupid.

So this weekend wasn't as busy as I thought. We skipped some things and relaxed most of Sunday, so I should have had plenty of time for writing, but that didn't really happen. Really, it was so freakishly hot that I spent most of Sunday relishing my boyfriend's air conditioned condo and trying not to melt into a puddle of goo. Sure, I could have also stopped playing the Sims long enough to type out a chapter, but...oops. I did manage a little writing on Friday after I posted the last blog, so that's something. But, really, between the weather and me being stupid, I'm surprised I get anything done. What did I do that was stupid, one may ask? Let me show you...

I may or may not have gone a little crazy at the library and placed several books on hold. Lucky me, they all decided to come in this week. Two of those books are mine, one is for a student, and the other two are from the library. I have two more waiting for me at my local library and about ten waiting for me on my bookshelf. Whoops.

But the plan right now is to stop organizing my closet (because, let's be honest, I wasn't really cleaning as much as I was organizing), maybe take a shower so my hair can be dried by the Mount Doom weather in about five seconds, and then write a little. Really, it's all just an excuse to turn on the air conditioning because my cat is being dramatic and I can only wear my hair in a ponytail for so long. I also have to sort some things out and then I might have another (tiny) surprise for Friday. No promises, though, because I'm not entirely sure about some things. We'll see.

I should change the blog name to that.

Wake Me Up When September Ends

Oh my goooood, is September over yet? Even though my boss made the smart decision to hire two more teachers (because it's just been me for a little over a year), I feel like I've had way more work to do. Most of that work has spilled over into my time at home, so I haven't had much of a chance to write. This would be a good time for any boss to get more organized and not expect the workers to do it for her or him.

No more rants. I think I filled my quota last time.

But that doesn't mean I haven't fit in a little writing time here and there. Since I know that this weekend is going to suck again (for free time), I tried to push the story along, but I'm still stuck at Donnie Grace's house. Not that it's a bad place to be stuck! It's very interesting and exciting, but I feel like half of the book is going to be in his village and then I'll just add a random ending. In truth, I'm a bit over 15,000 words (50 pages in Microsoft Word), but, in the last attempt of this story, this is the time that I shunted Amory out of Donnie's presence and into another place. So I'm going to try and get her out of there before 20,000 words, but I kind of like introducing everyone to new characters. It helps me because I'm not sure what I'm going to do with the old characters.

Sort of.

I guess there's just one place I'm a little terrified of. I wrote about it last time, but it felt like it was just any other place, when it definitely wasn't. It's the next place that Amory's going to, so I have to figure it out, but it's difficult. I'm not sure if I want to go the traditional route or if I want to create a whole new place like I sort of did with Heaven. But I guess it shouldn't be like Heaven, right? I'm excited, though, because the other new character (sort of) that I introduce in this place was so much freaking fun to write. She's such a bitch, but in one of those sweet, Regina George type ways. Next to Donnie, she was my favorite character to write.

So, I guess, that's where I am. After I finish this, I'm going to get up and finish cleaning my apartment. Then I'm going to get ready for the day and sit down here to write for a little while. I miss it. I didn't realize how good I had it during the summer. But, hopefully, now that I have organized everything that I need to and set some lesson plans far into the future, I'll have some more time to do the things I want to do. Writing and Sims 4, here I come!

PS - I wrote that title and then realized that it was that one Green Day song that dealt with Bille Joe's father's death, and I'm using it because I hate September. I don't even care. I'm keeping it.

Writing Takes a Backseat Today...

This weekend was a total bust on writing. I'm just getting that out first thing! We had a concert on Saturday and that pretty much wiped me out for Sunday, too. But what about Saturday day, Bree? Well, I played the Sims until about 2:30 in the morning the night before, so I slept in a bit that day. Yes, I have a problem. Someone send me to Sims rehab. I've already been to Triple Town rehab and it's worked wonders on me.

So. You might have guessed that I'm not going to talk about writing in this post. If you haven't, guess what? I'm not going to talk about writing in this post. Warning: this post might get a little serious, but that's only because I'm kind of angry and my cat can only listen to me for so long before she walks away.

Something you might not know about me is that I believe in feminism. Not the feminism that some women get twisted in their heads: the one where certain woman think that we want to take down men and oppress them, or that we don't like it when a man opens a door for us. That's just being polite; why wouldn't I appreciate that? No, I believe in equality for the sexes and that we should all treat each other with kindness and appreciate each other. I don't think that's so much to ask for, right?

I don't know how many of you watch football. My boyfriend loves football. I love Sundays because that means I get an entire day of hanging out with him and doing absolutely nothing. But over the last year, we've both come to question some of the dealings of the NFL. Especially when Ray Rice decided that he wanted to knock out his wife and then the NFL acted like it was no big deal. The whole video has finally been released and it shows exactly what we all knew: Ray Rice, vying for the title of Scum of the World, punched his wife into unconsciousness.

Slow clap for a wonderful human being, anyone?

Now, before anyone jumps on me for just going off on Ray Rice, I have to say something about his wife, Janay Palmer. She came out after the incident and apologized for her part in it all.

Sigh.

My boyfriend and I used to fight. Like, super angry and everything. But no matter what I said or he said, we never physically hurt each other. We understood the fundamental wrongness of that. Still, I could never imagine if one of us punched the other so hard that we blacked out, and then wanting the other person to apologize for provoking the other. Like, really? Janay Palmer must have woken up in another time, because that apology set women back a million years.

Where's Ray Rice now, one may ask? Oh, maybe practicing with his team because all he received was a measly two-game suspension. There's about a thousand articles out there asking the NFL commissioner to give Ray Rice a harder punishment. Um, how about sending his butt to jail, would that be a harder punishment? This man does not deserve to play in the NFL.

Listen, women (and significant others). According to the NFL, beating us up is only slightly more offensive than smoking weed. How are we punishing people for smoking a drug that's legal in some places and not for hurting fellow humans?And the NFL players get two chances to hit us before they're out of the league...for one year. So harsh.

This league is so backward. I told my boyfriend that I'm not watching football with him anymore. It makes me sad. There's some players that I truly love, players that stand up for what's right, but I can't watch something that degrades my gender so completely. Even my boyfriend said that he's lost his excitement over the game. I can't blame him, though. This incident has not shed wonderful light on men or women. We're kind of all losers.

Okay. Rant done. Sorry. That's been building up in my head for weeks now, and with the release of the rest of the tape today, it pushed me over the edge. If I wasn't such a good, moral compass (I had to take a break right there because I couldn't stop laughing), I would say something truly terrible about Ray Rice. But then he might punch me and I'd have to apologize, and I don't apologize well.

Sorry, I had to get a little punch in. (Ba-zing. Make sure to tip your waitress.)

Friday is back to writing! I'll try to get something done so I'm not just wandering uselessly around that post. I promise. And no more angry ranting. Well, maybe. Who knows? It's the fun that is this blog!

TGIF

My brain is so awake today that it only took about five minutes to realize that I'd been writing this blog in a Microsoft Word document. I'm going to mark today down as a good day.

So it's Friday. Summer spoils me. I woke up this morning and promptly thought to myself, It is far too early, I don't even have to work today! Ha. Haha. Hahahahahahaha. Not only do I have to work today, but I also have to clean up my apartment, pack a back for the weekend, and do about eight hours of work for two kids that don't appreciate what I do for them and a parent that treats me like a slave. Ah, work! Isn't it the greatest?

Mini rant over. I thought I would start this blog off by saying, Oh, sorry, The Sims 4 has been on my computer all this week, so of course I didn't get any writing done! But how wrong I am. I've done pretty well managing my time this week, and that includes running around to all the school districts to get substitute packets and seeing about jobs. I managed to fit an hour or so of writing into my day, and I'm counting that a victory. I'm hoping to get more done this weekend, but knowing me, I'll probably type out a page and then say I've done a good job so I will reward myself with eight thousand hours of The Sims 4. You might be laughing at that number, but I wouldn't. If it hadn't been for my humongous migraine last night, I would probably still be playing that game.

All in all, I'm not as progressing as quickly as I want in the story, but I am trying to take my time with things. I've noticed in my writing that sometimes I get impatient when I have a good idea and try to get to it as quickly as possible. If that means skipping some parts that seem pretty vital to the overall story, oh wells! That's what editing is for, right? The problem with that is I sometimes forget those vital things when the editing process comes along. When do I remember them? Once I've pressed published or send, and then I just mess everything up. So now I'm trying something new where I actually write down the good idea and then continue on with the story. Novel idea, right? Well, to me it is. I wrote down an idea the other day and kept typing away, and then when I put in the good idea, I was duly impressed with myself. It doesn't take a lot, folks.

I suppose I should get back to hour seven of mini lessons. Then two whole days of relaxing. Sort of.

(PS - I usually write a title to the post after I finish writing the post. Now that I wrote the title, I can't stop thinking about Family Matters and Step By Step. Just a little tidbit to share with all of you so you can realize how old I am.)

Sims Vs. My Attention Span

You know what I hate about long weekends? The fact that they have to end sometime. 

Sure, we spent most of our weekend in a sweatbox of a hall, watching sweaty men wrestle with each other (it was a wrestling show, I SWEAR), but it was nice to get away for a little while. It was even nicer to not have my computer and worry about a little thing like writing. So, yes, no writing was done this weekend, but I think I more than made up for it this morning. I'm planning on getting some more done before I have to go to work (UGH), but there's the teensy matter of The Sims 4 installing on my computer right now. Yeah, you read it right, The Sims 4. I know you're all bursting with jealousy, but, please, reign it in.

Yes, I still play The Sims. I'm not good at competitive video games. My competitive streak is a mean one, and I get frustrated easily. I know my weaknesses, and The Sims accepts those.

So, for now, there's no real update on the writing front. I'm going to try and get something done since it's only 11:15, but I make no promises after The Sims has finished installing. Hopefully it takes a long time and I can actually focus for more than five minutes. And maybe my internet will stop being a butthead so I don't have to keep stopping to scream at it.

Anywho!

I hope you all enjoyed the little snippet I put up last week. There's so much more to that scene, but I had to cut out a lot because I didn't want to spoil things or have to explain some of the stuff that came before and after. There will be more of those in the future, so watch out! I guess I should get back to writing so I have something to put up on this thing again. 

Oh. The Sims is almost done. Hm.

A Little Getaway

You know what I like about vacations? I get to go somewhere different (or maybe not so different) and relax. There's nothing to worry about, nothing to clean, nothing to stress over.

You know what I hate about vacations? The exact reverse of what I've just described.

There are about a million little things that have to be done before going on vacation, and they all seem to revolve around my cat. She needs food, water, a clean litter box, a place to sleep, a window open so she doesn't freak out. Then there's the packing: making sure I have everything in my bag, going through the list so I don't forget anything (I always do, and it's always a hairdryer), doing laundry at the last minute because I forgot that I wear real people clothing during the week, too.

So it amazed me when, at about 7:45 tonight, I found myself with nothing to do because I had already done it all.

Sure, I'm not completely packed (but the hairdryer is already in the bag!), but most of the little important things are done (or are being done...the cat's drinking fountain is in the washer as I type). I even had a few minutes to write a bit of a scene that deserves more of my time and attention. I know that this is going a lot slower than I initially thought it would, but I kind of like taking my time on this. If I step away for a few days, that's okay, because when I come back, the ideas are all there and they seem to manifest into something much better than before. Basically, what that all means is, I'm going to continue taking my time on this one. If it doesn't get done until after Thanksgiving, so be it. At least I'll be proud of what I've written (or so I'm hoping!).

On that preachy note, since I'm leaving for three days and I don't exactly know when I'll be back on Monday (but regular hours start up Tuesday, so I'll have something up that morning), I figured I would leave you all with something a little special. I'm not far into Amory's sequel, but I am far enough that I can give you a small taste of the adventure she's on now. In case you forgot, let me catch you up to speed (SPOILERS!): Amory's wings have been cut off by her best friend Drystan, leaving her in Bexington with her brother, her demon lover, and the rest of the crew. She's sent them all out into the world to find others that will join their cause to protect Rick and this small village, so that the humans can stand a chance against Heaven. The second installment picks up about four days after Amory has left Bexington. She, Oskar, and Fintan are searching the United States for someone to agree to help them. At one of their last stops before heading back home, they meet Jane North, a fierce demon camp leader that might know more than she lets on... (PS, this is not the final draft, OBVIOUSLY)

Truth be told, I’m not really in a hurry to meet Jane. I know it’s our job – the job that I set myself – but I just don’t want to stand around all day talking about fallen angels and I’ve now joined their ranks. It’s enough of a reminder putting on a jacket each day, my fingers hitting the small nubs of wing that Fintan couldn’t burn off.

            And then that brings up memories of Drystan. I don’t need to go down that road.

            Before another bad thought can even poke in my head, the door flies open. All three of us are brought to attention by a large, rather imposing woman. She towers over me, and even though I’m not exactly tall, the fact that the bun on top of her head skims the top of the door frame frightens me a bit. Her skin reminds me of the night sky in Bexintgon: beautifully blue-black, so dark that it seems to swallow the stars. Every feature on her face is big: eyes, nose, mouth. But it all fits her. She comes together wonderfully.

            “Can I help you?” she barks, her eyes taking in each of us in turn.

            Fintan steps forward, but the look she gives him stops him comically. Slowly, she turns her face to my brother, but he shakes his head, his eyes wandering down to his shoes. When she finally looks at me, I curse the day I set out with these two cowards.

            “Jane North?” I ask brusquely.

            The corners of her mouth twitch. “Who’s asking?”

            “Amory Ambrose.”

            An eyebrow crawls upward. “The fallen. How have I been blessed with such a guest?”

            I offer a smile, but I’m aware it’s more of a grimace. “Look, can we cut the crap? You know why we’re here. I’m betting that the moment we left Emily’s camp, she had already let you know that we were coming.”

            Jane blinks at me, and for one crazy second, I think she’s about to cut us down where we stand. Sure enough, her fingers twitch at her side, and my hand goes to the knife secured tightly at my hip, but then she laughs. In fact, she laughs so hard that she bends over, her bun smacking the doorframe on its way down. Both hands on her knees know, the back of her neck exposed to us.

            Oskar, Fintan, and I exchange a brief glance. Have we walked into insanity?

            “Good lord, little bird,” she chuckles, straightening again. The laughter is still written on her face. “You are a tough thing, aren’t you?” Quicker than a woman her size should move, she wraps her arms around me and pulls me close. Her fingers play dangerously close to my stumps. “I guess I should call you my little broken bird, huh?”

            I wait for the anger to come, but, surprisingly, it doesn’t. Instead, amusement bubbles out of my mouth. “I guess that would be the right term.”

            She pulls me inside the house while waving at the other two. “Get in here! Emmy did indeed let me know that you three were on your way here. But she said that you had some good things to say. She also told me,” she adds in a stage whisper, “that you were traveling with two gorgeous men, and she wasn’t kidding!”

            While she laughs again, I glance back at my brother and Fintan, both of whom have the good grace to appear embarrassed.

            We’ve been ushered into one of the coziest houses I’ve been in since Bexington. While most of the camps we’ve gone to have been just that – camps – Jane has obviously chosen comfort over anything. There’s no sign of tents or make-shift latrines anywhere: chintz chairs, pillow like sofas, a fire already going behind the iron grate. It even smells like a home: cinnamon and mint and honey and all those good things that disappeared from the Earth when everything fell apart. I wouldn’t be surprised to find a matronly woman bustle out of the kitchen with a tray full of out of the oven cookies and cold milk for us.

            But that doesn’t mean there aren’t signs of war here. Swords are shoved in the corner, thrown haphazardly into a stack. There’s thick iron bars over the windows, built on the inside, hidden from passerby’s by some pretty floral curtains. Paper is scattered across all surfaces, it seems. Jane pushes it all aside, gesturing for us to take the sofa across from a handsome leather chair set up right in front of the fire.

            She sees me glance at the steadily climbing flames and smiles. “We demons can never get enough heat. Am I right?” This seemingly rhetorical question is aimed at the two others.

            Neither of them says anything, but I notice that Fintan goes to stand at the fireplace while Oskar takes the seat closest to him.

            Jane smirks at me. “Demons. What did I tell you?” Then she claps her hands together once, loudly. I swear I can hear little disturbed feet scuttling for higher ground. “Now! You’ve traveled all this way for a good reason, I hope.”

            “You must know why we’re here,” Oskar says warily.

            “Of course I know why you’re here,” she huffs, rolling her eyes. Everything seems to be a joke to this lady. “But rumors and gossip can only get you so far. I need to hear it straight from the source’s mouth. In this case,” she adds, pointing her finger at me and winking, “from our little broken bird right here.”

            Strangely, the name doesn’t bother me. It’s better than the pitying looks I’ve received from most of the camps we’ve visited. Or the fearful ones. I’m not sure which are worse.

            “We need help,” I tell her frankly. “Bexington is the last peaceful place on this planet, and I think we all know why that is.”

            “Rick,” she says simply.

            I nod. “Rick. But now…We think that Toussaint knows Rick is hiding there. He has to. There have been angels and crazy humans bombarding that place for the last few months. The villagers are good fighters, really, but…” I shrug, looking up at Fintan.

            “But they do not have the kind of training that demons and angels have,” he picks up for me. “Amory thought that it would be prudent if we went out into the world and asked others with similar interests as us for help.”

            “And how’s that working out for you?”

            It could be my imagination, but I think I hear laughter in Jane’s voice. “For us? I mean…pretty okay. There’s been a few camps that like what we here. But…” I trail off, not sure how to explain.

            What can I say? How can I tell Jane that many of the camps out there are made up of terrified humans that don’t want to believe that angels and demons are real? How can I tell her that so many of the humans threatened our lives, that they chased us off their land without even listening to what we had to say? How can I tell her that she’s one of our last hopes, that we know she could convince many with her clout? Something about Jane North has made other camps bend to her will, and we could certainly use that right now.

            She’s the youngest creature we’ve come across. She can’t be more than twenty-two or so, even though she’s been a demon for five times that long. But we’ve heard other camps speak her name in reverence, seen the power that she’s amassed. Her camp is easily three times as big as Bexington, and that is some serious man power than could help turn this war around.

            Oskar’s hand creeps into mine. I take it gratefully, squeezing it until I think I can feel the nonexistent pulse in there. He offers me a smile, the same one that he’s given me each time we’ve failed.

            Have we already failed?

Quickie

You ever have one of those days that seem to go on forever? Well, that's sort of what happened this weekend. My boyfriend and I went to a music festival on Saturday, and even though it was only about four to five hours of our day, the next day gave way to sore legs and absolute tiredness. Honestly: I felt like I could have gone to bed around seven in the evening. I'm still kind of tired today, and I'm not sure if it's leftover festivalness or I'm just ready for summer to be over.

Either way, that's why I'm writing this on Monday night and ready to go to bed.

Before I started writing this post, I really thought about what I was going to say. It didn't feel like I did much of anything on the writing front this weekend, but then I opened up the file and saw that I probably put in a few thousands words. Time flies when you're having fun, right? But, look, between the festival and Doctor Who (oh my god, sooooo gooooood), it felt like nothing got done. But my bank account and word count tells me differently, so I'm listening to them!

This is the part where I'm supposed to say that I've been working hard since I've arrived home today, right? Well, I mean, I totally have. Just not on anything productive. Well, nothing for the story, I mean. But I've cleaned my kitchen, transferred my recipes over to one place (finally!), and watched the last two episodes of True Blood (save your time: super boring). Now that it's a bit cooler outside, I think after I finish this up, I'll try to get some writing done. This story took a big turn, but it's one that I felt needed addressing. It involves Amory's father, and it's something that I've skated over each time I write out any version of Amory, so I'm glad I had a moment to fix it up.

The next post will probably be up later this week. We have another long weekend in store for us, but I'll get something up either Thursday night or Friday morning. I'll update you all about where this story is going, and maybe a little extra surprise. Keep your fingers crossed!

Scheduling Time For Writing

So it's not Wednesday. Oh wells. Really, you should be proud of me for knowing that. This whole week has gone in a blur. One big, long, stressful blur. But the good news is that the source of my stress is gone. Also, this coming week is the last week of summer school! While my wonderful hours will be disappearing, it also means that I can have some time now and now drag myself home around five with a pile of stuff still to correct. That could be very nice.

But first, I have to get through this weekend without a sunburn.

Even though things have been pretty messy and stressful lately, and I've been a bit down in the dumps because of that, I've still managed to get a couple thousand words written. I'm still only on the first chapter, but I have to say (I believe I've said it before) that I really love this direction I'm going in. You know when you have a plan inside your head and then you execute it, and it turns out completely wrong? Well, that's how the first draft of this thing went. Some of the characters I had written didn't even make sense to me. A long time ago, I had imagined this one character that I ended up falling madly in love with, but it didn't make sense to put him in the first Amory. So I waited for this one, but when I wrote his scenes out...it fell flat. I ended up rolling my eyes at him every time he spoke, and that hurt my heart! I'm not yet at his introduction, but with the way that the other characters are going, I have high hopes for him.

I'm going to try and get some writing in this weekend. The festival we're going to isn't until two in the afternoon, but it's going to a long day Saturday. If I stopped writing this and maybe started cleaning my apartment, I would have a little time to write before I have to leave again and run some errands. You know, whenever I want something that I can't afford, my dad always says, "Sorry you weren't born a Kennedy." I would laugh because, really, who wants to be Kennedy? I'm perfectly happy being a Garcia. But sometimes I wish that the Garcia's had the Kennedy's money and I would't feel so bad being lazy and writing instead of cleaning or postponing something that would benefit my future.

Writing is a slippery slope into utter sadness.

Anyway! I'll let you all know what's going on and how well I've done with my goals this weekend. I'm already warning you all, though: no post on Monday morning. We're going to be at the festival until really late on Sunday, so I'll throw up a post on Tuesday. If you're lucky, it might be Monday night! But don't hold your breath. I might have come home from work and died.

When Life Gets In The Way

So, Bree, how did that schedule come along last week?

Shut it.

I have a very legitimate reason for not following my schedule last week, and it's definitely not because I forgot. Well, I mean, it sort of is because I forgot, I suppose. At a job, you're supposed to be ready for anything, right? Whatever your boss throws at you, you're supposed to catch it and say, Psh, no prob, I'll have this done in five seconds. Okay, now imagine that you work at a tutoring center where the organization there is...not best. Now, two new kids walk in: two kids that ask about a thousand questions per minute (even though they know perfectly well what they're supposed to be doing) with parents that want you to drop everything you're doing and dedicate all of your time to their children.

Fantastic.

So I've been working long hours and I've been so stressed out (or angry) by the time I get home, that I did nothing more than sit on the couch and angry read the rest of the Harry Potter series. One day I didn't even turn on my computer. Trust me, that's a shock. This week is the last week that the two new kids are here, and now I'm prepared for what I'm going to take on, so I should be a bit more on  par. Not just with the blog here, but also with the writing.

In case you're new here (or haven't read between the lines), you may not know that I love to be lazy. There is no better weekend than being curled up in bed (or on a couch or chair or floor) with a good book or maybe watching some TV. I also like to write because that takes me away from the stress that I call life. However, there are some weekends where I must get out of bed, put real people clothing on, and go out into the world. Lucky for me, those seem to be few and far between.

Not anymore, sucker.

Somehow, every band/wrestling promotion/comedian/what have you that my boyfriend and I enjoy seem to have decided on having a show every weekend in the fall. Starting next Saturday, I'm booked until September 26th. True, some of the shows are only one day, but those shows are usually very tiring and I need a few days to recover (give me a break, I'm old). That means I most likely won't be working on Amory during the weekends. I'm going to need my week to really get going on this thing. But then I'm still looking for a new job and I've handed my name into several districts for substituting jobs...so. Yeah. We're going to see how well this whole writing thing goes when it's distracted by real life.

But, really, now that I've finished Harry Potter, it shouldn't be a problem.

So, until next time (Wednesday, hopefully, unless my head has exploded), have a wonderful week, and enjoy the little bit of summer we have left!

National Lazy Day Was A Success

I did not have a very productive weekend (c'mon, it was National Lazy Day today and I'm nothing if not a stickler for holiday rules), but that doesn't mean I didn't start writing. Or rewriting, I guess I should say.

Would it please you if I said I have about 3,000 words already? It would? Wow. You are easy to please.

Yes, I only have about 3,000 words right now, but I can already tell that this version is going to be easier to write than the last. I know where I'm going with this one and I want to write this one. When I started writing the first draft back at the start of the year, I wasn't really into it. I think I was writing it more because I knew that was when I started revising AYLB and I felt like I should stick to a schedule. Instead of taking all that time organizing and making sure everything made sense, I just dived right into this one, sense be damned! But then, as I started writing, I noticed that my notebook started filling up more with questions and ideas and general notes about what I was doing wrong. I never mentioned any of that because I didn't want to discourage myself, especially when I was nearing 20,000 or whatever words.

In the end, I wasn't satisfied with what I wrote because it wasn't good enough. I didn't stop and think about what other people would think about it; I stopped and thought about if I liked it. And, like I said before, the more I read it, the more I didn't really like it. My notes and ideas made sense in my notebook, and I liked what I had there, but it was going to be near impossible to fit it in with the story. But now that I have a clean slate, I can include all those tiny things I wanted to add and they'll combine to make the story that I wanted to write.

So, it's the beginning of August (well, okay, the second week, but you get the idea). My summer adventure lasts for another two weeks and my weekends are about to get slammed (seriously, my calendar looks ridiculous). But I figure that if I spent most of the rest of my summer vacation writing, I should do pretty well. Like I said, I have about 3,000 words, and that was only from one sitting. I wasn't kidding when I said that this one is way easier to write now. But this doesn't mean that I'll finish it this month. And it certainly doesn't mean that (if I somehow miraculously do finish it this month) I'll be editing next month. But this story will get done, that much I promise. Hey, it's four months until Christmas, so maybe I'll be sending you all a great Christmas present! Or holiday present, I guess, is the politically correct term, right? Whatever, it'll be a present. Take it and shut your mouths.

Just kidding. But really.

Anyway, I guess I should get some writing in before I turn in for the night (oh, right, I'm typing this up on Sunday night). Maybe if I didn't spend so much time fighting with the Sims, I'd have been writing all this time. Priorities, people!

Hooray for August!

Well, that was another vacation!

I may as well get it out right now: I haven't been writing. I'm a terrible person. Horrible. (No good and very bad.) I've been thinking things over and I realized something. It's not something that I wanted to realize, nor was it something that I wanted to say out loud because that would mean some serious work. Not that I'm averse to serious work, but this kind of work would be something else. Okay, what did I realize? Take a deep breath, everyone:

I think I may want to rewrite the second installment of Amory.

Now that I see it in writing, it's not so scary. Look, I started writing this series back in 2008, and I had the idea for it in about 2007. The first book has been through the ringer so many times that I'm surprised Amory made it through (for reals: the first draft involved some weird kid that was supposed to kill Rick and start the second coming of Hell. Oh, yeah, and he fell in love with Amory and proposed to her). I can't believe that I thought this first draft would be okay with me. Like, I love it, I really do, but there's some things that I need to add, and I hate going back and adding them at weird moments. You know when you read a book and then see a really awkward, random piece of information, and you just know that the author stuck that in there during the second or third or fourth edit? I don't want that, especially because what I need to add is a pretty big component to the rest of the story, and that's not exactly something that you just throw in there. I've had this in my head for quite some time, but it didn't seem right while I was writing it, and now that I've looked at the story a few times, I know that's where I need to go.

So, yes, while I'd like to keep most of the story, I'm thinking about starting over. It shouldn't take me that long, as long as I start right away and don't dally around with things. I don't have a lot of time this summer because of work and looking for a new job and worrying about everything in between that, but I do have a few hours that I could spend not reading Harry Potter (fat chance, right?) or watching TV or playing video games.

That's been my problem with this story and I don't know why it took me so long to figure that out. I'd already edited it twice before I went back a third time and thought to myself, What is happening here? I wasn't into anymore. I thought that maybe it was because editing is a pain in the butt and I was over it, but now I realize that it's because I didn't like all the little things I had to stick in and smooth the story around. Not only is it annoying and time-consuming, but, after awhile, I started to not recognize my story anymore.

So, I suppose, I should get back to a schedule. My posts are going to come on Monday and Wednesday now (or I'm going to try my hardest). I'll keep you all updated with what's happening in the story and also maybe a few other things. Like, not only am I a German master now (not really), I'm also trying my hand at cooking. I can bake like no other, but cooking has eluded me. If I mess up cookie batter, that's no problem because at least I still have cookies. But if I mess up chicken, I'm screwed (for the record, I've made a few chicken recipes and they were delicious, so I'm not completely hopeless). But this schedule obviously started next week. This week is kind of filling up, but I thought I'd get something in. Let you all know that my impromptu vacation was not fun at all (long months with little paychecks never are), but that I'm back now and I'm going to get working.

After Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, of course.

Update...Again

Yep, yep, yep, I'm still around. Still lurking around the internet trying to find my way in life. That sounds way more dramatic than what I've really been doing for the last thirteen days, but that's what it feels like sometimes. I thought that I've had existential crises before, but this one really threw me. Being really down on yourself also doesn't help. But, thankfully, I've seemed to break through it and I've just started to really get back into my writing. Sure, Spike and Buffy may have had some help in that (weirdly enough), but whatever helps, right?

Seeing as we're halfway through July, I have to get my butt in gear. I feel like I'm racing against time here, and I have to remind myself that I'm only thirty-one. If things don't happen right away, then that's okay. Some newbie authors are entering their forties right now, so I'm doing okay.

My biggest problem is just sitting back and thinking that people are just going to flock to my book without even knowing about it. I've done some preliminary research on some of the review sites and it hasn't been too uplifting. Some of the sites ask for money, and that's not something that I have at the moment. At least, not what some of them are asking. Other sites are nicer and offer services for free, but they require certain things, such as so many reviews. Well, that's what I'm trying to do! It's a catch 22, but I'm trying my best to work with it all. More sales, more promotion, more everything.

I guess what I'm most worried about is turning into some of those authors that I follow on Twitter. While I understand what they're doing and why they're doing it, sometimes they bombard my Twitter feed with their book promotion. I suppose it's pretty successful sometimes, because I do click on the links and think about buying their books. Being pushy has it's perks, right?

But, besides all the book nonsense, I'll be glad when this summer ends. It's been so hot and I'm sure my electric bill is ridiculous and I'm ready for hot drinks and warm doughnuts and being able to wear jeans without the worry of them sticking to the back of my legs. I've also been reading too few books (sadly!!) and watching far too much TV (Buffy forces you to watch eight episodes in a day, I swear). But my German lessons are going well. Oh, did I not tell you all? Yeah, I've decided to learn German. Because, you know, in this day and age in America, German will get me far. I don't even care, though. I'm having a good time learning it and I'm super proud of myself each time my program asks me to translate some German sentence and I don't even have to turn to my notebook filled with foreign words. Seriously. I'm already ten pages into a new notebook and I'm trying to remember all the words I'm writing down.

Basically, I'm just trying to keep busy to keep the stress and unhappiness at bay. Hopefully this plan works. Fingers crossed.

I'm Alive!

I feel like I've been pretty MIA this week. I kind of spaced on the whole sale thing, I didn't once think about tweeting, and my Tumblr has been there for me to laugh at when I feel like strangling a child. It's been kind of crazy this week, and I thought that maybe I'd be able to get back on schedule next week, but I forgot that I'm leaving for a mini vacation tomorrow afternoon. I'll be gone until Tuesday afternoon, so I figured I would write this out and let the world know that I'm alive and that things have been good, just insane.

That does mean that I haven't been doing any writing this week. Not that I haven't wanted to or even had ideas for it. I've been jotting down things here or there (seriously: I just found half a napkin with dialogue written on it). I just haven't had time and when I do have the time, I'm too tired to do anything other than collapse on the floor and let my cat use me as a drooling board. I'm hoping, though, that when things get back to normal (the week after this one), I'll be able to devote a little time to writing. I'm still searching for a new job and trying not to spiral into madness, so there's a lot on my plate right now. But we'll see. Things have to turn around and go on the upside, right?

Anyway, I have to pack and clean up and make sure the cat won't tear the apartment into shreds before I leave. I hope everyone had a safe and festive 4th (or, if you read this outside of the US, a safe and festive any other day of the year!), and I'll see you all later!

Welcome Back!

So, the two weeks are over (more or less) and I'm back. Not because I have to be, but because I want to be.

I guess I kind of left without any explanation. Honestly, I didn't know what was wrong with me. All I knew was that I didn't want to write and I didn't want to do anything. Seriously: anything. I would look at my bed and knew that I had to straighten even a corner, and it just seemed like too much. I've never been inclined toward depression, but sometimes when things become too much for me, I shut down. I stress super easily (fantastic, right?) and have this awful habit of not talking about my feelings. So I bottle them up and then they just kind of explode, sending me into a depression-like spiral where I'm so lazy that sometimes I go a day or two without eating because it's far too much for me to make meals. That's where I was two weeks ago. My boyfriend and I are in talks to get a house, and that's a lot of responsibility, most of all in the financial department. So instead of just saying, "My goodness, I am awfully scared of doing this because I'm not sure how I'll be able to afford this," I shut down. I freaked out and me entire body fell asleep.

Now why am I sharing this? Well, a few days ago, I realized that this whole thing caused a mental shutdown, as well. This is also known as "writer's block." I've heard that it's painful, and I always assumed they meant physically. While, yes, it hurt my brain a bit, I understood the pain they were talking about. It hurts to open a file and stare at it for a half hour without any ideas, without any want to write. It was terrifying. I began having serious doubts about my future as a writer and that led to thoughts of, Well, really, does it matter? I don't think anyone is going to read my stuff anyway.

Scary.

This was also stemming from the fact that I know I need to get a new job and I've been somewhat of a slacker in that department. It's just, I love my current job, low hours and all. But we all have to grow up sometime and get real jobs, right? But my boyfriend pointed out that I wouldn't have much time for writing, and that hurt. I love to write, even stupid stuff that I know will never see the light of day. Most of the time it's therapeutic, a little listener that doesn't talk back. So that added a lot to the spiral downward, because if I didn't write, then what would I do to relax, to get my brain moving happily?

Basically what I'm trying to say is, while there's a lot going on in my life - and there will be a lot more added quick enough - I'm not going to quit writing. I won't be able to dedicate the time that I would like to to it, but I'll still be going. That does mean that if I keep putting out books, it's going to take a little longer than usual. Of course, I'm averaging one per year so far, so maybe it'll stay the same!

I also want to say thanks to those who take precious time out of their day to read the insane ramblings of a wannabe writer. I'll try and be better for the coming posts, and I'll even try not to complain too much about the duration of the World Cup (because, trust me, there's plenty in my brain right now).

Thanks everyone!

M.I.A.

You may (or may not) have noticed that I was absent last week. Things were kind of busy and hectic and, honestly, I was in a bad mood. Not one of those bad moods where I want to be angry at everyone and everything, but one of those bad moods were I wanted to go to sleep and never wake up. Not the best mood, really.

I was (well, still am) grappling with some stuff. Some of that stuff has to do with writing. I haven't lost my love for it or anything, but sometimes I feel like it's taking up a lot of time and it's just not getting the results that I want or need. I haven't stopped. In fact, I started a pretty awesome story last week that's not really my style at all, but I fell in love with it because it's been helping me get out some emotions and thoughts that I'm not entirely comfortable with. I tried working on Amory, but my mood didn't allow much. That doesn't mean that I'm off track or anything; it just means that I didn't work on it as much as I wanted to.

Now that I've sufficiently warned you, I can get to the bad news.

Tomorrow I start summer school. That means my hours change, so instead of going to work in the afternoons, I'll start in the morning and be home anywhere between 2 p.m. and 5 p.m. I could do what I'm doing now, which is write a blog post the night before and schedule it to be posted in the morning. Or I could tell you all that the time is about to change and to look for my posts in the early to late afternoon. Or I could take the third option, which is to take a little break from this thing and come back when I'm adjusted to my new schedule.

Based on last week, which option do you think I'm going with?

I'm not leaving forever. My plan is to take a vacation for the rest of June and then come back June 30th, since July 1st is on a Tuesday. And this isn't just because of the schedule. I have to step back and make some tough decisions about my writing and where it's going. I figure with one less thing to worry about, I can keep a clear mind and look to the future instead of making rash decisions based on the present.

But that doesn't mean I'll be completely MIA, no matter what the blog post says. I'll still be on Twitter (well, as much as I am on Twitter) and Tumblr (see previous parenthetical note), and I'm not leaving you guys empty handed! Tomorrow (Tuesday the 17th), All You Left Behind will be on sale for $1.99. From tomorrow morning (Tuesday...I hate writing for future dates) until Saturday at midnight, you can get the first book for almost 72% off! That's a steal! (Insert cheesy 80s music here.) For those of you who follow me on Twitter, I'll remind you every now and again about the deal (and that I'm still alive).

So, have a good June, people. I'll see you soon.

Not About Me For Once!

Oh my gosh, you guys, this is going to be a short one. Summer colds suck. Have you heard that one before? If you've been to this blog, then, yes, you have. I'm right in the middle of one and I have to get rid of it before tomorrow night for REASONS, so I'm planning on an early night loaded with AlkaSeltzer Nighttime whenever I can guzzle it down.

The good part of all this is that I have something to share, something that's not about me for once! We'll get back to that next week (mainly because since I've been sick this week, I've done zilch on the writing front, but lots on the Buffy front). I'm not entirely sure if, during my many gushing posts I included any books by Marita Hansen. If I have not, shame on me! She's awesome. Better than awesome. Each time she comes out with a book, I engulf it in one sitting. Seriously. Her books keep me up to all nights. Of course, I should mention that some of her books are not safe for young eyes, or even older eyes that don't appreciate a few hot scenes here or there. But rejoice, my friends, because she's coming out with a book that could appeal to everyone!

Back in October, Ms. Hansen had this awesomely amazing idea to write stories like we watch television: in episodes. My Master's Nightmare is steamy and sexy and hot and so, so dangerous. I was late to the party, so I was able to buy the first three episodes and devour them in one sitting. But that meant I had to wait until the next one came out, and that was no fun, trust me. But now! She's moving onto Ricardo, a sort of spin-off from those books, but (rejoice again!) if you haven't read any of My Master's Nightmare, don't worry! You can still read Ricardo. And, boy, do you want to...

The Santini brothers belong to one of the most powerful mafia families on their island. This is Ricardo Santini's story, the oldest of the brothers who has lost his lover to the mafia war that is plaguing his land. Due to his grief, he unleashes his violent nature upon anyone who dares cross him, his need to punish his enemies all encompassing. But what he doesn't count on is Bianca D'Angelo walking back into his life, the only other woman he has ever loved. Bianca had once loved Ricardo, but left him due to his violent nature. After an abusive marriage to another man, she vows off all relationships, just wanting to be left alone. But when she accidentally kills one of the most powerful men on the island, she is forced to stay with the Santini brothers for her own protection. Upon seeing Ricardo again, she attempts to deny her feelings for him, terrified of falling into another violent relationship. But Ricardo isn't one to be denied a second time, Bianca not knowing what hit her. (WARNING: Unlike RICARDO, My Masters' Nightmare is about the D'Angelo family, who are human traffickers. It has graphic non consent and dub consent scenes. If this isn't for you, you should wait for RICARDO (The Santini Brothers #1).

Is that not enough for you? Then how about the cover...

She always has the best covers, I swear.

Also! She set up a Rafflecopter giveaway that's super awesome! All the My Master's Nightmare (episodes 1-10) and then two of her other books, as well! Click here to win some amazing books!

Well, I guess that's it for me. Now I'm going to go die. Thank you and goodnight!